As men we should be well experienced with rejection. But what really helps you to cope when she spurns you?
Here’s an idea. What really helps you to handle her rejection is to recognize that there is a part of your mind, which always takes disappointment seriously. This part connects us to childhood emotional feelings of insecurity. Any disappointment, frustration, and loss will make us feel anxious and small, what we call a "child state." The key to handling rejection is to have COMPASSION for such young feelings. All too often, people are self-critical when they feel vulnerable-e.g. "Why am I making such a big deal of her rejecting me?" This only makes us feel bad. What REALLY works is when we can say, "Look, this WAS a disappointment and she "hooked" child feelings in me. OK, so how can I best take care of myself to get back "on the horse" and get going again." Such self -compassion and active coping can have amazingly positive effects. This is true for both men and women.
The most successful men with women will tell you that they are only successful because they are able to accept her rejection and not take it personally. Again, unsuccessful men take a 'rejection' as a personal assault on their inner child. Don't make that mistake.
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